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Monday, March 31, 2014

From Poop To Cameras...

Sometimes this life of ours just makes me laugh. And want to punch myself in the face out of frustration. How can nothing go smoothly? How can nothing be easy?

Here's an example. A couple weeks ago, I was getting ready to take Ella in for her overnight sleep study. I was packing our bag, getting her ready, all the while staying calm and not letting my nerves show so that Ella would see it was nothing to worry about and Ben would see it would be ok that I was gone for the night. At one point he said he didn't want me to go because what if something happened to me overnight or I died? I laughed and said "Ben! I will be at the hospital!! I'll be safer than any of you!!" That made him smile.

So I'm getting ready. Things are crazy. The kids are crazy and there's just chaos everywhere. Then I let the dog in from being outside and see that he has poop stuck in his long hair. Poop everywhere. Some still in his tushy, and most just all over his fur everywhere. 

Seriously? Right now, you need to pull this, Ollie?

So I held Ollie butt-first in the sink while Alex worked to free the dog from his poop explosion. We were basicly successful. But I was all wet and poopy, so in the little time we had left at home, I had to add a shower and change of clothes to my To Do List. Thanks Ollie. Really needed that.

Last week Ella had an eye exam as part of her preparation for entering Kindergarten in the Fall. The doctor dilated her eyes and we putzed around for a very long time in the waiting room. When the doctor looked into Ella's eyes, she sat there looking for a really long time. I started to worry. 

The doctor said that the nerves in Ella's eyes are asymmetrical and some are thicker than others. She asked about our family's eye history. She asked about glaucoma. I started to worry more. Something in the back of my memory jingled, and I told the doctor I've heard her say this before, but I can't remember which kid it was that she said it about. She said she'd look at the boys' charts and see if any of them have this problem too.

The doctor called me later and told me none of the boys have the same issue that Ella does. While we were on the phone, I said I think I remember her saying this about Ella's eyes a couple years ago. She said she hadn't had Ella's full chart at the exam, so she looked at it. Sure enough, it was Ella who had this same issue two years ago at her last eye exam. The doctor said this made her feel better, but that Ella should still come back in two years for another exam. We may need to take baseline measurements, she said. 

I asked my normal Mommy Triage Question: What should I watch for that would indicate there is some kind of problem with Ella's eyes? The doctor disappointed me by saying there is nothing I will notice that would tell me there is a problem. I hate that. I hate heart and eye and brain problems because I can't see the changes with my eyes and I don't know when something is wrong. I can't control it and I don't like it. 

The doctor also said Ella's eye issues could be from her prematurity. All three boys escaped any long-term effects on their eyes from being born so early. I guess we had to have one that would have eye issues.

So now there's that to add to my Kid Bible of symptoms, diagnoses, exam results, etc. Plus the fact that we found out after Ella's sleep study that she's allergic to latex. 

At what point does a Mama's brain become just plain overcrowded and refuse to remember any more information about her kids?

Ben has an old camera that my dad picked up at a garage sale for me a couple years ago. Ben loves this camera. He takes it outside all the time and takes pictures of nature. Birds. Fences. Whatever. He wanted to bring the camera, in its big bulky case, with us to Florida on our Spring Break trip last week. For weeks before the trip he talked about it. For weeks I strongly discouraged it. The day of the trip, he dug in his heels and said he MUST TAKE THE CAMERA. So we talked about how he would be responsible for it the entire trip. No one else was going to carry it in airports. No one else was going to do anything with it. It would be Ben's responsibility, and Ben's alone. He agreed to all my terms. So into the luggage pile the camera went.

He didn't use it once on our trip. 

But he did responsibly cart it through airports and into taxis and out of taxis and on elevators, without complaining. So all went well. 

Until the plane ride home. 

I don't know who put that stupid camera in the overhead bin, but one of us did. And then one of us forgot to get it back out at the end of the flight. I didn't realize it was missing until we had all our luggage from baggage claim, and I felt something was missing. I realized with total DREAD that it was Ben's camera that was missing. This kind of thing can completely obliterate any sense of normal functioning Ben might be feeling. He can melt down in the blink of an eye if there is something like this to spark his devastation. 

I told Ben we had forgotten his camera. Long story short, the camera was located on the plane, brought to Lost and Found, Grandpa drove back to the airport the next day to get it, and brought it to Ben the day after that. Problem solved. But Ben was still completely devastated. The camera wasn't in his possession NOW. It was out of sight, which means the problem was not solved. It didn't matter that Ben would have his camera back in two days, thanks to Grandpa and a flight attendant. So boy oh boy did we have a tough ride home from the airport after that. 

Sometimes Mommy just can't fix things. Sometimes Life trumps Mommy. I hate that. 

There are so many times when I just have to laugh about this crazy life. It's definitely interesting, and makes for a good story. Someday. A long time after the wave of rages and disappointments and stress has receded. 

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